The Bakers Adventures

We’re all guilty of deflecting our emotions onto others, it’s human nature. Whether it’s a bad mood, stress, or just being in a rush, we’ve all had moments where our tone, body language, or words hit harder than we intended. While we can’t always predict how our actions are received, we can try to do better.

Here’s the thing… we never know what someone is carrying. Triggers, trauma, or even just a hard morning can turn a small interaction into something much bigger for them. While it’s true that how someone feels is their responsibility to work through, meeting people with kindness and compassion will never make things worse. No one thrives under judgment or criticism! But a kind word? That can change everything.

Take my Monday morning, for example. School drop-off. Already juggling emotions, backpacks, and an internal pep talk to stay calm for my girls as they navigate their own big changes. Then comes the comment.. a passive-aggressive mention by the headteacher as the school gate of the lunchboxes piling up, laced with irritation. A simple sentence, but enough to send me spiraling into panic, shame, and the same “you’re forgetful and careless” labels I’ve worked so hard to unlearn.

Little did he know, I’d spent the morning nursing my child’s pining heart. Evie, who feels everything so deeply, woke up missing her Daddy to her core. So we slow-danced in the kitchen to her favorite songs, made Biscoff pancakes, and exchanged kisses and cuddles until she was ready to face the day. At the school gate, I handed her my special clover necklace.. a tangible piece of me she could hold onto.

Evie is struggling, but it’s different from Erin, whose ADHD means out of sight, out of mind. With Erin, emotions are big and fleeting. But Evie feels things she can’t see. Her emotions are rational, consistent, and rooted in the absence of something she understands.

So there I was, already feeling the weight of the morning’s emotions, only to be met with a look and a tone that suggested I was failing somewhere else. I’m not saying he meant to make me feel that way – he probably didn’t. But words and delivery matter. Imagine if instead, he’d said, “Hey, just a quick heads-up – there are a few lunchboxes piling up if you get a chance to grab them!” Same message, but with understanding and a neutral tone. I wouldn’t have felt compelled to rummage through the lunch lockers this morning, trying to erase the problem I felt I’d become.

We’ve all been both people in this scenario – the giver and the receiver of misplaced frustration. And maybe, just maybe, he was having a bad morning too. That’s why I chose to respond with kindness despite the sting. Because one moment of empathy could ripple outward and soften the edges of someone’s day.

Kindness isn’t about being perfect – it’s about trying. Trying to meet others where they are. Trying to assume fragility instead of resilience. And trying to remember that even the smallest gesture of understanding can turn someone’s hard moment into a little easier one.

We can all do better – myself included. The next time we’re on the edge of snapping or passing judgment, let’s pause and ask ourselves: How would I want someone to speak to me today? That small shift could make all the difference.